When in a negotiation situation, outside influences could markedly affect your ability to act with assertiveness.

Such outside influences that might keep you from acting with assertiveness  include:

1. The influence of authority figures

Such as a superior - this person could either advise you, or add pressure on you

A member of the law - such a person could protect you if physically threatened

A medical person - could offer advice and be authorized as a result of her/his professional standing to take medical action

There are others of course

2. Rules/Regulations within the workplace

Work guidelines - for example, anti-bullying, anti-harassment, workplace health and safety

If such guidelines do not exist, why not? How can they be created? Does each working hierarchy have representation?

3. External Rules/Regulations

Equal opportunity legislation and agencies

Industry ombudsman or watchdog

These are just some of the obvious ones

Here are some fun activities to do to cement your ever-increasing assertiveness behavior:

1. Ask to share a taxi with a stranger on a rainy day (Make sure it is safe)

2. Challenge a queue jumper

3. If you have a right to collect something, and the person says, it is not ready. By acting with assertiveness you could make them aware that a phone call would have saved you a long trip for nothing

4. Challenge a smoker when you see it is affecting you and people around you

Remember that acting with assertiveness has nothing to do with 'pushing your weight around', and behaving like a bully.

It is simply letting another person know how you feel, how the situation is affecting you, and doing it in a polite, courteous, respectful and assertiveness manner.

The other person is only thinking about how what they are doing is best for them, and more than likely, does not realize the effect that what s/he is doing is having on you and others around them.

It is simply a matter of having inner self-esteem and building outer confidence.

But how do you build confidence?

You deliberately

Take small, manageable risks daily with either person or activities

Do or say assertiveness type things you would not normally include in your repertoire of daily living, both personally or professionally.

Apply these activities in situations where the person is not a key player in your life, such as your boss.

What you are trying to do is to increasingly get out of your comfort zone.

Enjoy these assertiveness experiences, see their value and you will improve in your assertiveness behaviors.