Changing other's behavior toward you is a most necessary skill. Living with, and among people causes friction, sometimes conflict, and those that can problem solve the conflict interactions that occur seem to get the best from life.
Internet sales and the home business marketplace demand a high degree of skill in producing change in other people's behavior to be successful.
Changing behavior in a personal conflict situation is virtually impossible without assertion strategies.
Assertion skills are the forefront tools for effecting behavioral changes necessary for successful outcomes in human interactions.
What is Assertion?
Assertion is a psychological tool that gives the user power communication skills which are methods to stand up for personal rights. With assertion it is possible to change behavior that allows everyone in the interaction an opportunity to benefit in some degree.
By using assertion skills in a conflict situation you are able to express your own feelings, preferences, needs, or opinions that are not demanding, threatening, or punishing to another person.
Assertion will allow you to state:
1. This is what I am feeling
2. This is what I am thinking
3. This how I see the problem at hand.
Assertion also allows, in the sales or conflict interaction, the giving of respect, a sense of fair play, and a chance for compromise.
The use of assertion techniques will have the following messages:
Your statements of wants
Your understanding of the other's wants
Your feelings about the other's behavior
Your understanding of the other's behavior
Mixed with honesty about your feelings and wants, assertion will lead to high self esteem and self confidence for you.
Learning to say NO in a manner that does not lead to further conflict or escalation of the problem at hand is very rewarding.
You no longer need to "hide your feelings" to save an argument, nor to "hold your tongue" in case you will cause a fight. For it is generally not what is being said that causes the main problem in conflict but the MANNER in which the words are delivered.
Even the most difficult interactions can be resolved by correct presentation of physical stance and information delivery.
Direct non-threatening eye contact, a softly modulated voice, low gesture activity, and a relaxed stance will go a long way to help conflict resolution.
Because assertion is often confused with aggression it is necessary to be constantly on guard against misinterpretation.
Remember that assertion skills provide the chance for a win/win situation. Aggression can only lead further to promote conflict or withdrawal. You will fail in your endeavors when aggression causes either of these two outcomes.
